Tuesday, 2 June 2015

Brainwaves and Boxes


   Now my peep is not the frivolous sort, no ma'am, and he certainly takes spending seriously.... no strike that, he certainly takes NOT spending seriously. Case in point was the energy saving light bulbs which were anything but! But I digress, and as peep is frowning at me I best not persist on that, least ways not until after supper.

   I have noticed a distinct pattern to the way things go with my peep when it comes to purchasing, or rather not purchasing. There is the initial discovery period "Stage one" when peep has read something, and usually starts with the phrase "hmm...that's interesting, I wonder if..." and is nearly always followed by searching for a tape measure and then browsing on the internet.

   Stage two can go one of two ways. Usually the paper or magazine with the "must see" article is stacked up for further inspection at some yet to be decided date. The down side of this is, given my peeps poor memory, once something been put aside peep can't always later recall where it was or in deed what it was. This initiates a leafing through....OK, scratch that, it's actually a manic tossing around of the vast pile of papers and magazines, oft with the result that he rediscovers something else interesting and off on a tangent things go! Cost saving, messy and not very fulfilling I know, but it does make for great Peep TV!

   Alternatively, peep, having found something interesting, goes forth to try to find the same item in our local shops, or as has become customary, peep heads for a renown Swedish furniture store for a reconnoiter, sometimes twice or occasionally even three times! Peep will even go to this store when the item is not only not in stock, but was never and will never be sold there. I think its my peeps form of retail therapy, whereby peep goes there to be worn out, and having wasted the fuel and time to get there, is less inclined to waste any more money buying anything. Who knows, not I for sure, I get exhausted just describing the to-ing and fro-ing. Mouses!

   Stage three "the purchase" is most definitely serious. Any item that has made it this far must, by all rights therefore have some sort of merit, be a truly worthy product able to serve a higher purpose and no doubt save the universe and make coffee too! OK....the latter isn't strictly correct......it would need to make coffee first, and then if it had time, save the universe! Alas, despite all this attention, deliberation, sweat, heartache and miles walked and driven, the item of desire is often as humble as a new plate, a light bulb or some of those natty Swedish plastic food savers with the blue lids.

   Peeps resolve to buy something has however been known fold at the last moment, oh yes, whether a momentary lack of will power, or some attack of guilt, he just can't go through with it and at the last minute hasn't bought the intended item. Clearly wishing to save face, and by way of satisfying his spending desire, he has bought something of lesser worth like those natty Swedish plastic food savers with the blue lids! We have a lot of those food savers, as you can imagine, but they do make rather nice plant pot saucers.

   Now the latest string of visits was in aid of  a new chair for our shared desk, where peep does his tweeting and attempts to write his book, and I do this blog. Having a bad back, (nothing to do with age, before anyone says anything, not that I would) peep thought it was high time we had something more comfortable to sit on rather than the strange single legged stool with no back, which wobbles and spins round on itself. Let me tell you, trying to get onto such a stool as a cat isn't easy, no ma'am, and get a bit too eager pushing that there mouse around and you can end up spinning around and Toms your father your sat paws up on the carpet. Wowser!

  After short deliberation and a long nap, I decided we should compromise on something that supports peeps back, doesn't spin, and has a nice fabric, preferably in pink. Now over a few weekends, peep descended on various specialist shops around the county in search of the ideal chair. Now when I say descended, I do think Miss Description should check that phrase out, as there were absolutely no ropes being dropped through roof lights, peep doesn't do heights, not unless they have a ground floor attached! No, it was more peep made a brisk and businesslike assault on the chair department, sat on loads, checked colours, size and spun around a bit, well a lot actually, and then left. Peeps isn't very good at talking to sales peeps, could be the male peep lone hunting instinct or something, but irrespective of  advice on offer, he wont ask for advice not until he's happy with what he's chosen, then he's ready to take advice. Sounds daft to me, I'm all for jumping on things and seeing if they squeak! I mean squeak as in un-greased bearings, not mouses!

   Well, still with no decision imminent, I took the offensive and clawed the Swedish firms brochure from the pile, sending a shower of paper and a perfectly good soft napping spot all over the floor. Mouses! I'm in trouble now I thought, but out of the mess peep had a flash of inspiration, a brianwave no less, (well either that or he saw the catalogue I'd put my paw on) and grabbed his jacket and headed back to the one shop he hadn't thought to go to. You know sometimes I do wonder how peeps would ever get things done without us cats. Now peep, were did peep put my cream dish?

   Sometime later peep returned home, somewhat triumphantly, with a lamp, small box and a selection of those natty Swedish plastic food savers with blue lids! Now I failed to see the joy at having such a tiny box, far too small for me to play in and no where near being a chair! Hey ho, at least the plastic food savers could be used for Nip seedlings, and the lamp was in fact pink and rather trendy. Hmm.... maybe peep had succumbed and finally bought me one of those indoor hydroponic kits for Nip! OK, maybe that wouldn't be a good idea as peep may get arrested by the police thinking he was growing lawn. Why growing lawn is illegal I don't know as there is plenty around, for sure. What's that peep? OH.....that sort of lawn! apparently there is lawn and there is lawn! Who knew?

   Consoling myself with the fact that I had at least a nice new pink desk lamp, I sat down and watched peep unpack his box. Now, I have heard tell of magicians pulling rabbits out of hats, something I dearly want to see done with mouses, but to pull a chair out of a box so small was beyond belief. Yep, peep undid the lid and took out ten separate pieces and within a trice was assembling a new five legged/wheeled adjustable full size chair with back rest in black, called Lill something-or-other, named it seems after a village in Sweden, maybe a very flat village in Sweden, but clearly one skilled in chair packing for sure! I wonder if they have hats and rabbits too?

   Now it has to be said that I have never had so much fun on a chair since my mate spike (the Hedgehog) and I discovered this old sun lounger and a length of elastic and made a cat-o-pult, or is that a hog-o-pult? Anyways that's another prickly subject. Mouses!

   It has to be said this new chair is fantastic! Not only does it go up and down, it goes around and around in a nice not falling off kind of way, and not because of the wheels on the bottom, no Ma'am, the seat revolves too! Now peep seeing all the fun its giving me, has set it up in the room so that I can play hide and seek with my paws around the back part of the chair whilst sitting on the seat bit as peep gently turns me around to chase a wand toy that he has bought. Also with a modicum of practice, I can jump from one of the pieces of nearby furniture, land on the chair, get it to spin part way round and I can launch off again in another direction. Granted there were a few miscalculations, near misses and one, OK two or maybe three (that's all I'm admitting to anyhow) crash landings, but hey were talking about breaking new ground in feline play technology here. Given the quality of the fabric I can also vouch that it does wonders for the claws. Purrs

   I must now confess that peep hasn't really had a look in, or in deed a sit on, on his new chair and has, backache or not, taken to sitting on his old single legged stool. Keeps saying something about there being too many hairs on mine, cheek, I'm not that sort of Princess!

   Anyways, if Mr Swedish furniture peep you happen to read this blog, and wishes any more seats test driving for the "feline fun factor", please feel free to contact me direct. If you contact my peep it will take weeks to get a reply, and you'll probably just get a selection of those natty food savers with the blue lids in return. Mouses!












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