Saturday, 16 July 2016

The Bed!



You know life here at the Palace isn't just all local matters, mundane easy going things, no ma'am, there are also important tasks of national importance that require daily attention, consideration and fine tuning.

In fact these can be dangerous too, take the other day for instance. There was I minding my own business, namely checking everywhere for miscreants and Mr Creants, though I've never yet found one of those, when it hit me....

****** Wavy lines and passage of time ******

Hum de tum de tum de....

****** CLANG ******

OWWW!

My poor head!

What the mouses! whats going on? why has all this junk metal been stashed behind the official Palace cat flap? I mean if I'd been in a hurry I could really have done myself a mischief, or should that be missprincess, anyways this Princess needs to have words with the refuse peeps at the council. Hmm I think I'll just head back to a nice quiet bush to recompose myself, and my head....

****** A short time later ******

Right, its off to work I go, and a phone call to make about scrap metal prices. If I can get a good deal I'll throw in the Eiffel Tower I won on that scratch card, that has bound to be worth a pint or two of cream. purrs

Hi ho hi hum and a tiddly de dum,  hi ho hi....

****** Muffled thump and bump ******

OWWW!

What the mouses is this? No sooner than I've got through this here flap than I've been bounced right back out again on my er..... behind! Oh my poor head! my poor behind! my poor nose! I feel positively squished. It's not every day one runs into a rubber wall.

Why on earth would someone, anyone, want to put a six foot high rubber barricade INSIDE the Palace. Now had it been outside it would have served the defence network admirably, not that the Palace has a Navy or an admiralty, no ma'am, being land locked it sort of makes it a bit redundant, unless of course you count the moat which you might say arguably doesn't need a Navy as it would just be going round in circles all day...

Oh so that's what a circular argument is! Hmm I wonder why it's called a Navy though? I mean in this day and age why not call it a Pink or maybe a Puce green or maybe even a Marigold?

Anyways back to the whole moat thing, I really don't think there's much need for rubberised reinforcements on account of the Kraken we recently installed courtesy of our blogging pal Bionic Basil, in fact having the two might well be a non starter as I'm fairly certain Kraken don't look good in Navy and may well clash in Marigold. purrs

You know after all this being bounced and squished I just need a nap to sooth the fevered brow and dented derriere! Best maybe if I head up to the bedroom as heavens knows what will turn up if I head back out the flap again!

****** A short time later ******

Nothing like a good jog up the stairs to work up an appetite and a yawn, I'll just hop on to my favourite sun puddle corner of the bed  and....

****** THUD ******

OWWW!


Oh my giddy aunt, bless her, what the heck is going on! Wheres the rest of my bed gone?
I swear there was a whole bed here when I left this morning, yup definitely remember sleeping on a bed just there, at that spot where there now ISN'T a bed. It was a full size 100% soft, warm, comfy bed.... and all mine, except for the corner peeps sleeps in, complete with that sun puddle in the bottom right hand corner.

I mean I know we've had a lot of rain recently, but surely it hasn't shrunk? Hmm on that thought I wonder if peep has tried to wash it it again?

I do recall last time peep fell out with the Palace washing machine there were months of retributions in the form of lost stockings and many holes in leggings. In fact there were so many holes, those leggings ended up being used by the local fishing fleet! Who knew a washer could be so touchy over being taken for a soft wash and a short fast spin. Mouses!

Anyways, if I had wanted a shrunk bed I'd have asked for it, and I certainly don't recall having put a work order in for having my bed laundered and shrunk down in size!

I wonder what happened to the rest of my bed? I mean is there a refuge centre for unwanted sections of beds, to keep them off the streets and sleeping rough, or forming gangs and terrorising innocent people on park benches?

Or maybe as my great pal, Seville at the Nerissas Life blog in Canada, advised, it could be that the Weasel Syndicate out his way is trying to get a pawhold in the UK by the fiendish plan of stealing our sleep by stealing parts of our beds! One day it will be a Queen size then a Double then before you know it, it will be a Single and as sure as cream is meant to be drunk by cats, before you can say Tom maybe my father, we'll be sleepless zombies forced to take refuge in the laundry basket! OK, maybe I exaggerate just a bit about the laundry basket, there is no way with peeps size that is going to happen! purrs

****** Later that evening ******

Hmm, so seems like peep needed to make more room for all my new office furniture, and downsizing the bed was the only way to go. Whilst the extra floor space is always handy for dining and party games with my guests, does peep really expect me to share this... this... footstool? I mean it took a full size bed to attract those lovely sun puddles, and if I've not a big enough catchment area I wont get the right size sunpuddles and thus lack the right vitamin D and who know where that might lead, more and longer naps, and more naps between naps.... OK, I can see that there may be a few advantages, best sleep on it to see, just in case I missed anything....

****** The following morning ******

OK so this isn't too bad, I get to have the bottom, side middle and top right sections and peep has the bit near the top left corner and the gap between the bed and the wall. I mean why waste space, and it's not as though peep could fall down that gap, if you know what I mean. purrs

Ooh I just had a great idea! Maybe I could open a Part Bed Emporium, selling to peeps who have gaps to fill between their current beds and their walls, sort of filling a niche in the market as it were! And of course there is the submarine market too, stands..... er..... lies to reason that those peeps are bound to want narrow beds living in those narrow tubes, and for when they come home again so they don't feel away from home sick!

PEEEEPS! Wake up and phone the Pink, Marigold, Puce, and the Navy, I think we may just have a way to cut the UK's National Budget down to size!





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

IT'S SUNDAY SELFIE TIME!!!!

Welcome everyone, to the fabulous Blog Hop hosted by the Wonderful Kitties Blue over at The Cat on My Head Blog....

After a hard week sorting out missing parts of beds and how best to feed my new Kraken, seems like she isn't too keen on the current diet of mail delivery peeps, I decided to have to have a little ME time, just a few minutes. purrs                                                                 

To see what all my other pals across the blogging world have been up to, and some fab selfies, click the links below!




64 comments:

  1. Oh my CAT you have had a bit of a do haven't you!! I hope it all settles down and you get a good rest Erin!!

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    1. Thank you, yes I shall take a weeks break, between naps, and official engagements, marriages etc, and catch up on the missed sleep due to bed shrinkage! purrs ERin

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  2. Hopefully the coming week will be relaxing.

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    1. Hi Jeanne, I do hope so but I need to be on my guard in case the bed gets any smaller! purrs ERin

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  3. Erin, don'tcha hate it when the peeps change everything around and the one that is most affected by it is you??? We like your sleepy selfie.

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    1. Hi guys, yes it seems to happen so often here, I do think my peep forgets who actually brings home the mouse in this Palace, slaving day and night, and what thanks do I get? a smaller bed! purrs ERin

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  4. I agree with Dash, normal would be a good thing Princess!

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    1. Hi Brian, I do hope normal comes quickly as I am running out of bits that haven't been thudded, squished or banged into! purrs ERin

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  5. We can only imagine how disconcerting that shrinking bed episode was, Erin. We like how you think, though ... smaller beds = smaller budget! :)

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    1. Yup you've got it! I told peep the idea was a winner, all I need is to get the Ministry of Defence to try it and then I can go into business and make a killing, metaphorically speaking of course. purrs ERin

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  6. Bed shrinkage is no fun. And of course, either is being bumped on the head or running into rubber barricades. Hope you can catch up on some rest and relaxation.

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    1. HI! Absolutely, I do not recommend bed shrinkage, plays havoc with my built in sat nav, not to mention the fact peep can extract my live visitors easier and quicker, spoil sport! purrs ERin

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  7. Adorable Erin, you definitely deserve a royal, lengthy, snooze after all of that!

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    1. Thank you, it is such hard work keeping on top of things, literally, it seems these days. Peeps just dont seem to think before they cause chaos by moving stuff! purrs ERin

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  8. My Momma knows we can't get along on anything less than a bed for a Queen (ME! ... yes, yes, I only claim to be a MALE PRINCESS, but I like to think big). And sometimes, I take all that too. There's always the twin (ie single) in the second bedroom or the floor. Actually never mind. The best part of the house is the part she wants. Like her desk chair ;)

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    1. Nothing wrong in thinking big, Bear, whether it be beds or whole roast chickens, the latter preferably but both would be nice. purrs ERin. PS I have tried to get peep to sleep on the floor but the complaints were far too numerous, despite having asked for them in writing and posted via Brazil. purrs ERin

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  9. You sure have had a busy week. I think your idea of selling bed parts and submrine meds is great.

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    1. I tell you the Palace is all go most of the time then all stop for the rest, with definite bits in between that I'm just not sure about, so I nap through them. I'm hoping I can make some cream money from my idea, I mean a Princess has to have a hobby, besides collecting cheese. purrs ERin

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  10. Sorry to hear about the downsizing, Erin. Good luck with the kraken!

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    1. Hi guys, the downsizing really takes the biscuit, fortunately peep has not touched the cream or my treats! Hmm the Kraken is mite problematical, I just can't get a uniform to fit, and nobody is prepared to come and measure her up for size! purrs ERin

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  11. Princess Erin you no doubt deserve a royal bed and with all the trimmings! We sure hope the remainder of your week is much better!

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    1. Thank You my friend, I will make sure peep sees this. As to the trimmings, what did you have in mind? something tasty maybe, with a light cream (I'm watching my figure) sauce and a sprinkling of nip... that sure would be heaven! purrs ERin

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  12. We're sorry for your shrunk bed ! We hope everything comes back to normal very soon ! Purrs

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    1. Thanks, me too, a shrunk down bed takes a lot of getting used too, for peeps that is. Personally I do hope we seen the last of the changes, but with peep in the mood for redecorating who knows where it might end! purrs ERin

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  13. Oh My Cod! Your Peep downsized your bed!?!? That is horrible!!! When wes moved, mes INSISTED my mommy gets a Queen Bed (after all mes is a queen) but the glorious thing is me no longer has to share the bed - except with Mommy. Yous should makes ure yous lets your Mommy know yous is displeased - the back of shame works wonders - and purrhaps yous will gets extra treats!!!
    Kisses
    Nellie

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    Replies
    1. Thank You Nellie, I'm glad you see it how I do... If I had known I would have definitely held a sit in and sit on. I mean I do have standards and mattresses to maintain. Now that is an excellent idea, I should definitely hold out for extra treats. In fact I'll have a ban on mouse chasing during the day, but up it at night... yes I think that will do it! purrs Erin

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  14. Oh! mes forgot!!! Most excellent selfie Yous looks marvelous darling!
    More Kisses
    Nellie

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    1. Aw thank you, Nellie my dear, that is very kind of you to say. I do try to keep up appearances even when napping, but it can be hard work with a peep around to look after... they just don't realize, do they. purrs purrs ERin

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  15. Grate bloggie an selfie ERin Purrincess kittygurl....
    ***paw patsss*** Siddhartha Henry xxxx

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    1. Purrs and thanks my dear friend, and paw pats and head bumps too. purrs ERin XX

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  16. Naps between naps? I like the sound of that!

    Goodness, so much going on in the palace, Erin! It's a wonder how you keep up with it all. I'm glad the downsized bed ended up meeting your high expectations. Your selfie during Me time is wonderful!

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    1. Yup those extra naps can make quite a difference, build stamina (for naps) and help stop whisker fatigue. Keeping up with things isn't easy but I try, and it is sort of fun too seeing what else peeps can come up with for me to deal with. purrs ERin

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  17. Replies
    1. Hi guys, yes I tries my best to help peep out with the Palace funds, and if I can boost my cream fund and help the UK cream market, I do feel it's my patriotic duty to dlend a paw. purrs ERin

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  18. Your peep replaced your bed with a footstool? MOUSES!

    Oh, okay.. Replaced it with a smaller bed. Hmmm...

    Well as long as you still get the majority... Scratch that. As long as you still get the VAST majority of said bed, said bed will do.

    Purrs,
    Seville

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    1. Hehe, it's still a work in progress, I just need to train peeps feet to stop where I put them down the side of the bed, and things will be ok. purrs ERin

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  19. You look just bootyful Erin. And dat sounds like a great plan. Mommy just threw one of our kitty beds in da washin' machine today. We sure hope they don't shrink. 'Course it's not like we actually use them. MOL Hope you have a blest day.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

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    1. Thank you both, I think it's all the hard work we have looking after our peeps that keeps us fit, but boy is it tiring! I do hope your bed doesn't shrink, leastways not as much as mine did! purrs and blessings from your pal ERin

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  20. A smaller bed?! What could be the meaning behind this?!? Unacceptable, we say!
    We also want to say thank you for the kind words of love and support on Milton's memorial post today. We truly appreciate it <3

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    1. I agree, but my protests fell on deaf ears... apparently I agreed to this in the small print when I got my new desk! I do smell a mouse here, and not the one living under the bed! Hugs and purrs to you all at this time. ERin

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  21. OUT WITH THE PEEP!! How dare he DOWNSIZE your bed!! The horror of it all. Why my Mom L and Dad P upsized their bed years ago just to accommodate kitties

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    1. I definitely need to have peep upsize the Palace, I mean if this carries on I'll not have any large furniture to sleep on, and that won't do for a Princess and state guests, whatever their state! purrs ERin

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  22. Sounds like there has been quite an upheaval going on. Shouldn't you have been consulted first though?

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    1. Hi Flynn, peep seemed to think I wouldn't notice, on account of me napping so much. Ha! not much gets past me you know...... Ooh was that a mouse just go by? gotta dash! purrs ERin

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  23. What? A smaller bed? Not acceptable! You should get a lawyer.

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    1. Hi Lola, you're right, and I am searching the small ads as we speak, well it is now a small bed! purrs ERin

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  24. ERin.....just sayin...but in de cat roolz book, para graff 13 on page 29,033: sentenzez one thru de hole thing two de end... kleer lee statez ANY change in de catz houz must bee a proooved, in advance { 37 monthz } & if at any kinda time de cat findz a diz a gree mint with said changes; de catz peepul{s} are subject two a heftee...make that HEFTEE...fine...

    ewe will bee abe bull ta get a lot oh creem with what yur peepulz owe ewe ...just sayin !! ♥♥♥ ☺☺☺

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    1. Oooh I do like the sound of this book, I wonder why I've not heard of it before? Clearly I have a good case (and a not very good bed) so I shall file my suit straight away. Hmm there is one snag, I've not lived with peeps 37 months! I wonder if I should just claim single cream rather than double? purrs ERin

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  25. A smaller bed, unheard of! Well, I hope the sunpuddles can still find you!

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    1. Hi! Well it did find me but left earlier than normal, I think it went looking for the other bit of my bed! purrs ERin

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  26. A smaller bed seems very suspect to us Erin... but more office furniture sounds good for magnifying your executive importance... ;p

    the critters in the cottage xo

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    1. Hello! Suspect in deed, but with my new desk I do feel I should be able to rise above it all. I will however be writing to The Times to question the whole downsizing issue, this country just can't take much more what with the shrinkage from all the rain we've had! purrs ERin

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  27. Thank you so much for celebrating my 10th Birthday with me! Purrs, Dragonheart

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    1. HI! It was lovely to come, and the food was wonderful! I will be having a go at you competition later tonight... purrs ERin

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  28. Erin it sounds like mew have a vicious bed-shrinker on the prowl, did mew tell the kraken to be on red-alert fur all highly suspect purrsons? BTW mew can always change the colour of the kraken - I can send mew the easy read, 938 page manual that explains most simply in 3028 steps how to do it! MOL

    Purrs

    Basil XOX

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    1. NOOOOO I can't afford to have the bed get any smaller! I'll prime the Kraken... Erm what does it look like, this shrinker? Oh yes please send the info, but not to peep who can't cope with such things, maybe Maxwell from A Tonks Tail could do it for me, that is if you're not free? It would be fun to have a colour coordinated Kraken, I wonder if it could cope with Union Jack colours? purrs ERin

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    2. Noooooo mew can't have that happening at all!!!! The Kraken is your best option fur sure and as fur what the bed-shrinkers look like is still a mystery as nopurrdy has effur seen one... EEEEK! MOL

      We find having a colour co-ordinated kraken is the way to go, howeffur we mainly use ours in 'purredator mode' obviously we have goggles so we can see it but it's invisible to effurypurdy else :D true stealth mode :D #sneakykraken or #ambushkraken MOL

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    3. Ooh, Sneaky Kraken sounds great fun, I'll try that, unless that means at cards too, in which case I'll just stick with "Purredator mode", but I'll need the goggles as peeps is hopeless even with them on! purrs ERin

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  29. A Princess should NOT have to go through all this sort of thing, not at all. We still think the Weasels are behind it all, somewhere.

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    1. I agree, on both counts. Deep down in a dark weasel den, they will have a scheme, for sure! purrs ERin

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  30. Maybe it's something in the water. We have similar activity going on at our house. You had me seriously worried there, Your Majesty, when I thought you were going to have to *GASP!* sleep on the floor like a commoner. It's quite Royal of you to allow your subjects to have a small portion of the new bed...

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    1. Hi Herman... I'd not considered the water, hmm I best check the Kraken out and see if she's shrunk in size.... Yup, I couldn't leave peep to have a bad night on the floor, after all a sleepless peep means a grumpy peep and one less able to get my breakfast, supper etc... purrs ERin

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  31. Maybe it's something in the water. We have similar activity going on at our house. You had me seriously worried there, Your Majesty, when I thought you were going to have to *GASP!* sleep on the floor like a commoner. It's quite Royal of you to allow your subjects to have a small portion of the new bed...

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    1. Hi Herman... I'd not considered the water, hmm I best check the Kraken out and see if she's shrunk in size.... Yup, I couldn't leave peep to have a bad night on the floor, after all a sleepless peep means a grumpy peep and one less able to get my breakfast, supper etc... purrs ERin

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