Saturday, 6 August 2016

LIGHT MY FIRE!

So there was I, minding my own business when I happens to notice we were out of kindling...  Not the small version of the electronic book I hasten to add, but the woody sort of kindling used to make the fires light, and chopsticks for noodles.

Why they named wood after something that quite clearly isnt made of wood is beyond me, but hey, I said, what do I, a Princess, amateur algorythmist, and solver of the famous P=NP conundrum know of such things?

Well clearly not as much as some, but I do think those electronic book folks may well wish to sue those wood naming peeps for beech of.... oops sorry, for breach of copyright or something. Mind you, as the old saying goes, if you cant beat them or chase them around the place before you eat them, you may as well join them and have an easy night of it and a long nap!

Whats that ol' gluten free one? plain English you say? Translation you say?

OK, well what I was coming to was, why not make those electronic books out of wood?

I mean books are made of wood, and it is environmentally sustainable and biodegradable. Maybe if you had a sort of sapling living book, it could grow and the book could expand to form a whole collection, like an encyclopedia.

Of course with a living book you'd have to be wary of various insects and nesting creatures. Heck it would be a disaster if just as you reached a climactic bit you found that a lesser spotted woodpecker, re-known for being not spotted very often, had drilled right though and nested just where the killer is revealed. Mouses!

And can you imagine all the mess in the libraries if the deciduous books all shed their leaves come autumn! Those poor librarian peeps would be picking Gone with the Wind from everywhere!

And as for the nut situation, well, those squirrels would be a right pain taking bits of books and burying them here and there. And that would lead to no end of cross pollination issues, we could end up with new classics such as War and Two Men in a Boat, or The Tale of Mrs Puddle Duck's Adventures at Hogwarts! Hmm that could work, I wonder if JK's agent is available for a chat?


Anyways, so there was I, minding my own business, as one does, when I happens to notice we were out of kindling. I hasten to add we hadn't run out of wood, no ma'am, and that there wood pile keeps growing and growing when various guests leave us gifts for our fires. In fact just last week I found a pile that looked just like a book case we have, and another that had a striking resemblance to my old bed. Who'd have thought those clever Scandinavian furniture peeps, renown for those natty blue food savers with blue lids, had special trees grown shaped like beds, who knew?

Now where was I? Hmm, oh yes...... I was minding my own business, as one does, when I happens to notice we were out of kindling. Now when I say out, that isn't strictly true, as we do actually have large amounts of kindling in the Great Hall. Sadly, a family of mouses has taken up residence, claimed squatters rights, and taken out a High Court injunction to stop eviction, harassment or otherwise consumption by yours truly. Peeps has also been served with a preservation order on the kindling pile on the grounds that it's a pile of architectural importance by the late Mr Chippendale. Now what two chipmunks have to do with a pile of chopped up furniture is anyones guess, but until the assessors have been in we're stuck with each other. Mouses!

Hmmm. I know I was doing something just now, I wonder what?

OK that thought's gone, I best tell you about something really embarrassing that happened last week. Really embarrassing for peep that is, and not me as I don't do embarrassing on account of being a cat, and we always do what we mean and when we mean it. Those video's on the Internet aside, which are actually all staged by professional cat actresses and actors, you will never see a cat doing anything funny. Honestly, I jest you not, when was the last time you saw a cat do stand up? purrs

Anyways I had just seen we were out of kindling.....

Whats that peep?

Cut to the chase you say?

Well if you don't mind me saying, it's me who tells the stories around here, and when I say that I don't mean lies, no ma'am, that just isn't good form and can lead to sprouting noses! Oooh... now there's a grand idea for some kindling....

Peeps ol' fruit, start telling me a story about your weight loss program, and then about your greatest achievements, I think we may just have solved the kindling and mouse housing issue! purrs

                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


IT'S SUNDAY SELFIE TIME!


Welcome friends, this week's selfies are hosted by the FABULOUS Kitties Blue over at The Cat on My Head blog..... many thanks to them all, for hosting this fabulous event.... which today is celebrating a WHOLE two years old, AWESOME! Where would Sundays be without them.....



This weeks photo finds me midway through one of my many Palace duties, namely checking all the Palaces rooms for old Christmas cards. And so in best pantomime tradition I you safely say "They're behind you!"








Have a WONDERFUL week, and to see what all my pals have been up to, please click the links below:-
















60 comments:

  1. I truly think you have hit on something there, Erin!! It just needs some teaking... Errr tweaking!! MOL xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Austin... Oooh, tweaked noses, that just might make it to the Olympics, as a special event maybe, just in case there is a doping scandal to be resolved. purrs ERin

      Delete
  2. We all know you're the best story teller Princess! Hey, your selfie is beautious!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Brian, you areba gentlecat, for sure. You know I just cant turn up the chance to tell peeps about the day to day lives of ordinary Palace folk, some possibly with long noses! purrs ERin

      Delete
  3. Hmmm...no kindling could be a problem when it gets cold!! Love your selfie!

    The Florida Furkids

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Guys! The no kindling story could be a major issue for sure but after a certain incident, involving peep and an axe, the kindling situation has improved... lets just say that elastoplast shares went up at the same time and order was made!

      Delete
  4. Erin that sure is adorable selfie of you!! YOU are such a gorgeous tuxie!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww thank you, that is very kind of you to say... I put it down to a natural diet and long naps, followed by cream and more naps! purrs ERin

      Delete
  5. I'm not sure how I feel about a living book, since you do mention there may be insects. I like to curl up in bed with my book and I would hate to find an insect or two joining me. I love your selfie. Your expression is too cute!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Guys! Books with insects just wouldn't work in my forest... er Library. I do like to read in peace and a book worm looking over my shoulder would be so off putting... not to mention I would be wanting to chase it everywhere! purrs ERin

      Delete
  6. Mew mew mew ERin you has thee cutest xpresshun on yur face!!! What wood yur Mumma do without???
    Hu'manss toe-tallee need us so much!
    ~~head rubsss~~ Siddhartha Henry~~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Siddhartha Henry, I do think you are right, peeps just would be lost without us... I know mine would be, the number of times I've had to retrieve peep from the wrong wing of the Palace! purrs and head bumps to a deal pal. ERin

      Delete
  7. Erin! Yous looks most marvelous in your selfie darling! And mes thinks my Mommy is addicted to her kindle...shes ALWAYS reading!
    Kisses
    Nellie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Nellie, and Thank You, I have been working out.... well Peeps has been working out for me with a furminator! My peep got a Kindle of the non wood sort, and promptly lost it. Real shame as had just got a book to review. We have gone back to the paper sort as easier to hang on to. purrs ERin

      Delete
  8. Sighs. We think your hooomins should let you tell your story YOUR way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi guys, and thank you, yes my story my way with no editorial interruptions and plenty of naps and cream. Not sure how I can do that on the web, but I'm working on it. purrs ERin

      Delete
  9. Erin, oh my goodness, what a cute selfie with your tilted head and I do believe I detect a smile.

    I am thankful books aren't living. Nesting creatures do not sound good. Well, they sound good to me but not to the lady.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Annie, I do think those deportment classes I had as a kitten paid off, though I seldom get to balance a stack of mice on my head! Hmm maybe in hindsight nesting creatures in books just isnt going to work, there are probably too many health risks. purrs ERin

      Delete
  10. Great selfie! I hope you get more kindling soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, me too, though with the injuries peep sustained trying, we will be buying kindling rather than making it. purrs ERin

      Delete
  11. My mum says she doesn't fancy a living book, but I think it could be quite entertaining. That is a lovely selfie.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Flynn... yup I could see how a book of mice and sparrows could be quite entertaining as a little light night time snac... er, reading. Mind you anything bigger than that could get a bit messy on the sheets. Mouses! ERin

      Delete
  12. Tell your peeps this is your blog and you'll tell stories in your own way!!! Love the selfie ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Guys, will do. That's the thing about some peeps they're either a critic or an editor but not a listener. purrs Erin

      Delete
  13. You're lookin' just bootyful Erin. Hope ya' get dat kindlin' issue figgered out soon.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Dezi, hi Raena great to see you. That there kindling issue will go on for a bit yet, at least until peeps finger recovers from the ax that went in it. Mouses!

      Delete
  14. Lovely selfie, Erin! We're not entirely sure about living books, but Zoe *does* like chasing flies that get in the house, so maybe you're on to something! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmm sounds like they would need some species specific books. I'd definitely want the Mouses of the World Identification Manual (non pocket version!) purrs ERin

      Delete
  15. Trees growing in the shape of beds. Who knew?? Bawhahaha. That's s very funny thought

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, thanks for coming by.... I do think they could, I mean they grow cat trees, don't they? purrs ERin

      Delete
  16. Replies
    1. HI Bear, between us Princesses, I didn't show too much did I? I thought the balance was OK for a family blog an' all... purrs ERin

      Delete
  17. Erin, you look as if you have a great big smile on your face in your selfie. Ver nice! Thanks for being a hopper. XOCK, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi guys, congratulations on your two year Hop anniversary! I did rather enjoy the interlude in my duties, and yes I was smiling, peep had just discovered the present I got mysel... er, HIM, and left on the floor that morning, way more fun than a box of Christmas cards! purrs ERin

      Delete
  18. You are such a wise cat, Erin!

    Love the selfie :)

    Purrs xx
    Athena and Marie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Athena, Hi Marie. I do try to get a solution out of a crisis but sometimes peeps just doesn't see it that way, and says something to do with how I'm a catalyst for a problem? Well I am a cat but not so sure on the lyst bit as I do walk straight. purrs ERin

      Delete
  19. The look on your face in the selfie tells us what exactly you think of the peeps :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Bear. Peeps do need to be kept guessing, so sometimes I frown and sometimes I smile... especially if peep has just found the special present I'd left on the floor for peep to give to me . Heartening to get a present, especially when it is just the right size. purrs ERin

      Delete
  20. You may be on to something with this whole living, growing book thing, Erin...And, we love your selfie! The expression on your face is too cute!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, it's great to have you come on by the Palace. There are some pro's and con's, for sure, but it could be fun to have a book as a child or kitten, that grows with you into maturity... What I need is a sponsor, and then a nap to think about what I could do with the proceeds... purrs ERin

      Delete
  21. Hey Erin! A book made out of wood? The mom says she's afraid she'd get splinters! Nice selfie, by the way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi guys, no worries over splinters, peep says that they sand the corners to make them smooth! Of course the down side is that you find sand in your bed for weeks after! purrs ERin

      Delete
  22. ERin....ewe noe....we think ewe haz hit on de eye dea oh de centuree....bookz outta
    kindlin izza grate eye dea....knot ta men shun if termitez try ta take over de pages..
    de termites can bee eaten rite then & ther.....good read....good snax....yea....high paws !!! ♥♥♥☺☺☺

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. High guys! High Paws right back at yer! Well looks like we need a production plan.... do you know any good nursery books... er sorry that should be nursery's FOR books. purrs ERin XOXO

      Delete
  23. Hi Pwincess Erin. Pwincess Adorapurr here. Yoo can call me Dori. And yoo don't have to jen-u-fleck either. Anyway! About dis kindlin book stuff. Purrsonally I don't wread cuz... I haz better things to do wif my time. Like wrassling wif my brofur Fwank. My author mom no like wreading books from her kindling. She sez God meant for books to be made of paper and she doesn't want to mess with His mojo. She haz one of them kindlin things but... I think she uses it as a place to set her coffee cup. Wuv your bloggy! See ya on da Tweety! Purrs! Dori

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Princess Dori, it is Wonderpurr to meet such a renown Princess such as yourself, I adore your adventures with that wonderful Herman. I agree, books are for reading in print rather than pixels.... as for kindling, well that is for the mouses! Have a Wonderpurr week, purrs ERin

      Delete
  24. So adorable, love reading your blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank You. My life is just as you see it, though there may be less cream at times there are always plenty of mice to be had. So drop on by and enjoy. purrs ERin

      Delete
  25. You know... YOU KNOW... If I'm not mistaken, those noses that grow when lies are told might very well be made of... KINDLING! MOUSES! purrs

    Purrs,
    Seville

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now if you're right I could just about get through the winter! Mind you peep might need a lot of tree surgery. Mouses!

      Delete
  26. Catching up and horribly late BUT HERE!!!! Too much time watching GB win medals at one remove via the BBC Live feed (no pictures and no video from the BBC (C) Copyright). See you on Twitter and FB

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi and great to see you my friend, and glad you are enjoying the Olympics. I was thinking of entering the 100m dash, but the furthest any mouse has ever done for me is 15m around the great hall! purrs ERin

      Delete
  27. Your selfie is precious Erin. My apologies for being so very late coming round to visit

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Absolutely, no problem my friend you are always welcome. Thank you, it is rather cute I think, I may have it put on my official stamps, just so folks know what to expect when they open up the letters. purrs ERin

      Delete
  28. Who knew the kindling getting low could lead to such deep thoughts and ideas? That is the sign of a very creative mind!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, it's nice to be appreciated, unlike my peep who thinks I'm all about the hedonistic things in life.... but this is clearly not so as I do eat tails and other things! Purrs, ERin

      Delete
  29. This post is even better the second time! Thank you for linking up to the Showcase :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Momma, and Bear, it's great that it works a second time... we still haven't solve the kindling issue though! Purrs, ERin

      Delete
  30. No kindling?! But it's winter time! You definitely need kindling for your fire. Do you have a dog around? You could use his/her toys as kindling. Neat idea about the living book too!

    ReplyDelete
  31. A living book sounds kind of creepy.
    Nevertheless, you are one smartand pretty kitty!

    ReplyDelete