Sunday 24 September 2017

The Wind Up?



© ERIN THE CAT PRINCESS. NOT FOR REPRODUCTION IN ANY FORM
© ERIN THE CAT PRINCESS
OK. Just need to check everything is in order....

Music phonograph? Yup

On/off switch? Hmmm wheres the on/off switch? can't see it anywhere!

Hang on theres no power lead either, no wonder it won't work. I know it's supposed to have a rechargeable power supply but there should at least be somewhere to plug it!

Bloomin' travelling phonograph salesman swore this was the latest in self contained Eco friendly Mega Woofer sound systems. Will be the envy of all my neighbours he said, come from far and wide to stare, he said. Hah! I'll be the laughing stock more like if I can't turn it on.

Clearly this entails a moment of careful thought and the clear insight of a honed expert in the field of electrical equipment management. If I settle myself down on this nice soft round rubber mat I should have an answer..... *yawns*

Sometime later.....

........ *yawns* in no time. Now where was I?

Ooh the new sound system. Right.

OK, so clearly I need to get a handle on the situation so I shall call in my trusted adviser...

OK maybe not trusted, I mean when it comes to things electrical stuff this peep is as safe to hang on to as a lightning rod in a storm!

Hmm, and maybe adviser is too strong a word too.

I mean I tend to listen, at times, then pick the least offence and most ridiculous option and do the complete opposite. Never fails, in fact why I pay an adviser I don't know!

Whats that ol' peep?

You don't get paid you say?

Well If I'd have known that I'd have given you a 100% pay rise. Still in the current recession I think you should be grateful for having that garden shed roof over your head. Keeps the rain off.

If you're good, Santa may even bring you the walls and floor too! Though I must insist you do extra chores before we splash out on a door. Now you can't say fairer than that!

When I said get a handle on it, peep, ol' dude, I didn't mean get a handle....

Hang on, by any chance is that the starter crank handle from the Bentley? Ive been looking for that for ages. Where did you find it?

In the nip patch you say. Well well well, I wonder how it got there?

ME!

Surely not I, I mean....

Ah. Now you come to mention it, I think I did.

Yes I recall now, I thought it would be a good way to make the nip crop grow quicker. Give them a good start in life is what the gardening experts always say you should do for seedlings and that there is a starter. And if you look at the results I think you'll agree that they've started very well!

Whats that you say ol' mildewy one? They're weeds you say. Mint, and NOT nip!

Well I know they're Mint, I'm not one for buying second hand nip plants. And they did come in a new packet that said Mint on it.

Nope, the travelling mint sales man assured me they were the best quality, MINT Natural Om Tibetan Nip. NOT Nip he said, with super cool relaxing qualities without the side effects. Apparently you can party all night with this NOT Nip and still be fresh come lights out at dawn. I mean what more can a party animal ask for?

© ERIN THE CAT PRINCESS. NOT FOR REPRODUCTIONYou see I'm not just a pretty face! No ma'am, and I got a massive deal and bought the whole lot and planted a few everywhere.

Looks like well be able to corner the NOT Nip market in a couple of weeks for the UK, and maybe the world by........ a week next Sunday!

Anyways, you still haven't explained ol' green fly covered one, why you have the starting handle in your paws. You've not been planning to go shopping on your own for potatoes again. How many times have I told you since the incident with the penny farthing, the Brussels sprouts and the guide dog, and a really tasteless kilt, you have been banned from the village store. In fact I heard tell they're putting up braille posters of you just in case you try to raid the post office!

Whats that you say? It winds the record player? REALLY!

OK well seeing is believing, crank away ol' Palace cranker!

* Clockwork winding sound*

Well I'm waiting, and thus far we have lots of crank and very little action! Are you sure you haven't lowered the undercarriage by mistake?

Look, if you can't sort it I'll have a go. It can't be too difficult if a human invented it.... OK strike that, it is probably way TOO complicated, after all you peeps have opposable thumbs!

Hmm I wonder what happens if I press that little lever there, like thus........ *CLICK*

Ooh, I can feel things vibrating and.... and.... and...

Oh heck the rooms starting to spin, oh my head! Oh my tummy! I swear I'll not touch another drop of that home brew nip wine ever again!

LET ME OFF....... *YEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOWW.......THUD*

Oh my giddy aunt, now that was a listening experience I don't ever want to repeat again.

No wonder those radio stations have professional jockeys, but if those machines are like this one you'd have thought a rodeo rider would have been far more apt!





I do feel that this whole music business is just far too dangerous and over rated. I think next time I'll stick with the radio and just phone in my requests. In fact I'll do it now....

Hello, Operator? Yes hello, this is The Palace.

Yes THAT Palace! Is there any other?

Oh well of course her Majesty ER II does have one too, but this is the next Palace on the list. Yes, I know about the rest, but they don't count. Now, my good man, will you put me through to Alexander Palace, home of the BBC.

WHAT! What do your mean they've moved! Hmm bet its all down to the recession and downsizing because of the kids.

Well OK, if you'll put me through to where they have moved to that would be fine.

Thanks......

Moments later.......


Hello, is that the Disc Jokey for the BBC? It is, brilliant. I would like some special requests playing as soon as possible..... like now.

Yup, they are all dedicated to those that fall off record phonographs...... Yes I do realise how strange that may seem, but it does happen.

Anyways if you don't mind, I'd like to hear that excellent hit by the popular beat combo Dead or Alive... you know the one?

You do!

Oh goodie, I think "You spin me round (like a record)" is exactly the track for the occasion!



                                                           ~~~~~ The End ~~~~~



And now for a Sunday Selfie......



This is my best 'hard at work face' whilst I was busy toiling away in the kitchens...... OK so I was only making biscuits on my favourite duvet, but the thought was there. MOL

          
                 
I am joining the Sunday Selfies, hosted by the fantastic Kitties Blue: XOCK, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Angel Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth, Calista Jo, and Cooper Murphy, from The Cat on My Head blog 


The Sunday Selfies is a wonderful weekly celebration of blogs and bloggers from across the world, and shares stories and pictures for others to enjoy. 



Why not join the fun by adding the code from our hosts, (a link is on their page) and posting your own selfie.It really is that easy
















46 comments:

  1. I dunno, mint may be good, but NIP are NIP.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nip it has to be in this household or cream, nothing else will do! the peep loves the mint for tea, and aids digestion and calming especially as the Mint has run riot around the grounds and taking ages to now dig up. Well as I say, gives the peep something to do on a cold rainy afternoon!
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  2. Hmmm I think you're right about phoning in your request,xx Speedy

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    Replies
    1. I can tell you I'll be sending that machine back to the manufacturer as unsafe... they should fit a seatbelt and handrails MOL
      I shall stick with the good old fashion candlestick phone and wireless in future.
      Toodle piping purrs
      ERin

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  3. Your ideas about the sound system sound pretty sound to me! Your selfie is most wonderful Princess and I hope your week is totally purrfect!

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    Replies
    1. Hehehe, thank you Brian, I love the pun. That there machine sure was giving me the needle in the end so away it's gone. MOL
      Have a great one yourself.
      Toodle-oo and purrs
      ERin

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  4. We know that song, Erin, and it's purrfect. Best to have the DJ play it, though, since that old time-y record thing sounds scary!

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    Replies
    1. Yup I sure think you're right on all counts, and the player thing has been sent back as faulty as for all that cranking the battery didn't last more than one record!
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  5. Well, that was a SAGA. You certainly know how to tell them, that's for sure. As for nip, has your anthro ever tried it for calming the noives? I am told there are strange things in its make up....but my mama won't try it either.
    Love from Loulou

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    Replies
    1. Hehehe glad you enjoyed the EPIC! The PHONOGRAM device has been sent back, and the peep is now hard at work smoking mint! Well at least that is what is supposed to be happening, putting it on the bonfire, as we have way too much of the stuff now, even for the world!
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  6. Oh dear, I think the travelling phonograph salesman and the travelling mint salesman must have been brothers. You had better watch out for when the snake oil salesman comes calling.
    That is a lovely selfie.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm they did rather look alike to me, but that could just be something to do with genes? Oh well I will ask the snake oil salesman when he comes if he knows them....
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  7. Replies
    1. I rapidly came to the same conclusion, with a thud. Still no real harm done as the pee took all the force of the landing on some of the many plump spots. MOL
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  8. Wonderful selfie sweetie!
    Have a great Sunday...

    Noodle and crew

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, you too, I hope Autumn isn't as saddening with you as it is here at moment and that the sun shines soon.
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  9. Dear Ms Princess Erin, I kind of, sort of, got losted somewhere between Niviru being found and called a planet, the music maker and the mint (not Nip). Oh! You were not talking about Niviru you say? It must have been the news in the background...or is is fake news like that weird orange man who yells on the TV from the USA....
    Anyway, Princess Erin, your selfie is gorgeous.
    Your loyal subject
    Marv

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ah sorry if I confused matters..... it must have been that mint that did it, which definitely seems to be NOT nip. MOL
      Hmm you have an orange man on TV!? Is that from Florida? We have an orange man on TV here but he hosts a game show that deals in antiques good or bad. I wonder if they're related?
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  10. Oh you DID make us laugh!!! What is going on oh Princessy one.

    You need to keep control of that peep!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi gang. Glad you enjoyed my little spin around the record world. MOL
      I definitely do need to control the peep, I have tasks that need doing and the peep needs to do them, cranky or not!
      Toodle-oo and purrs
      ERin

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  11. Erin we expect a shipment of Not Nip by weeks end so we can do a review for cats in the USA. No better way to get the orders coming in I would expect.
    Now stay off the tables that turn dear so you do not bend dear friend!
    Timmy and Family

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh heck! I just had the peep expunge the Not nip on account of the Not Nip not being nip! I can however send you some mint seeds?
      As to turntables, believe me that is the last one I'll be taking for a spin. MOL
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  12. I'll spin on a phonograph any day with you, Princess! Let's dance 'till the mint is gone! Mew Mew & kisses! -Valentine (& Mom) of Noir Kitty Mews

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    Replies
    1. Oh you tease you, Valentine! Maybe it should be a Tango........ or something a bit slower, maybe? And I don't mean a 45rpm. MOL
      Purrs and paw kisses sweet and floofi Prince
      ERin

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  13. ERin; we getted taken on sum nip/mint onze two....faaaaaaaaa fool uz once N bee cursed we said ta de garden shop that sold uz fake stuff.....N ya noe; if dad haz one oh thoz gram
    o fonez....itz werth like a bazillion dollarz !!!!!! ☺☺♥♥

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    Replies
    1. Hmm I bet that garden shop must be related to that travelling salesman that I had, they do get around, don't they! Drat, you mean I shouldn't have sold the gramophone for those magic beans?! Oh well maybe I can buy it back with some of the mint I have! MOL
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  14. Replies
    1. Thank you, all in a days work, well a days biscuit making anyways. MOL
      Toodle-pip and purrs
      ERin

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  15. Dat's a serious face fur sure Erin. Serious and bootyful. Hope you enjoyed da beats. We're not furmiliar with dat purrtucilar song. MOL Big hugs

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

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    Replies
    1. Hi Dezi hi Raena! Thanks, I tries my best with the music but the peep doesn't always find da beats helpful for a good nights sleep. Not my fault I like to groove to da beat at 2AM! MOL
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  16. Dat's a serious face fur sure Erin. Serious and bootyful. Hope you enjoyed da beats. We're not furmiliar with dat purrtucilar song. MOL Big hugs

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

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    Replies
    1. HI ladies, I shall try and get the link to the tune on youtube...... https://youtu.be/PGNiXGX2nLU
      Enjoy purrs
      ERin

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  17. That is one strange music playing machine, Erin. Excellent selfie too...we love your hard at work look.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, the machine definitely was not worth the money. MOL
      Toodle-pip and purrs
      Erin

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  18. luvluvluv your selfie Erin and I bet'cha your sound is doin' great about now

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, I like the active selfies, even if the biscuits aren't the edible sort. MOL
      Toodle-pip and purrs
      ERin

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  19. MOL...You are one kind of girl, Erin...Seems like the No-Nip got you a fantastic ride...MOL :D *sings: you spin me right round, baby, right round...* and a great Selfie too :D Purrfect story! Pawkisses for a Happy Week ahead :) <3

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    Replies
    1. Hehehe it sure did. Thats a great tune too for cool cats on the disco floor. MOL
      Pawkisses to you as well my friend, and a happy week too.
      Toodle-oo and purrs
      ERin

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  20. Mighty nice of you to provide the shed for the human. Bawhahahhahahahaahha. Hopefully, he eventually gets some walls, too. Bahwhwhwhhaaa

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    Replies
    1. I thought it was very generous too. It cost a fair bit of the peeps wages too! I think by Christmas we should have a wall or two spare or if not I can supply some plastic bags for the windows as a stop gap MOL
      Have a great week
      Toodle-pip and purrs
      ERin

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  21. Sounds like your Peep has you going in circles ;) Maybe keep a claw off the record?!?

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    Replies
    1. Hmm I thought I could practice being one of those disco DJs and put the claws in an do the scratching effect, I reckon I could be good at that. Mol
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  22. Erin, that's so typical of door-to-door sales peeps, say its one thing and it turns out to be something completely different! Mew know the next time one turns up at the drawbridge of the place, RELEASE THE KRAKEN! MOL

    Bestest purrs

    Basil & Co xox

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    Replies
    1. Definitely, anyone bearing musical instruments is hence forth going to have to audition for the Kraken. If it's a tentacle down they get eaten up they get to come in and have some supper. That X Factor man won't stand a chance as the Kraken thinks he's really tasty! Hehehe
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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  23. I hope they played your songs. XO

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    Replies
    1. Hi, they sure did, and I made the peep sit on that confounded contraption too... alas the weight was too much and the peep didn't achieve lift off as I hoped!
      Ne'er mind.
      Toodle pip and purrs
      ERin

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